Author: Fred Allen

Quotes

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

- Fred Allen

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

- Fred Allen

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand.

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand.

- Fred Allen

Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.

Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.

- Fred Allen

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.

- Fred Allen

Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great.

Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great.

- Fred Allen

A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.

A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.

- Fred Allen

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.

- Fred Allen

Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.

Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.

- Fred Allen

Similar Authors: