Author: John Cleese

Quotes

For me, the great problem growing up in England was that I had a very narrow concept of what God can be, and it was damn close to an old man with a beard.

For me, the great problem growing up in England was that I had a very narrow concept of what God can be, and it was damn close to an old man with a beard.

- John Cleese

But then acting is all about faking. We're all very good at faking things that we have no competence with.

But then acting is all about faking. We're all very good at faking things that we have no competence with.

- John Cleese

I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.

I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.

- John Cleese

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

- John Cleese

I'm always meeting new people, and my list of friends seems to change quite a bit.

I'm always meeting new people, and my list of friends seems to change quite a bit.

- John Cleese

If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'

If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'

- John Cleese

I was always a sports nut but I've lost interest now in whether one bunch of mercenaries in north London is going to beat another bunch of mercenaries from west London.

I was always a sports nut but I've lost interest now in whether one bunch of mercenaries in north London is going to beat another bunch of mercenaries from west London.

- John Cleese

You don't have to be the Dalai Lama to tell people that life's about change.

You don't have to be the Dalai Lama to tell people that life's about change.

- John Cleese

Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.

Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.

- John Cleese

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