Author: Lewis Grizzard

Quotes

I was raised to think women had babies, stayed at home, and men worked. By the time I got ready to do it, I thought I had all the answers. Only somebody had changed the questions.

I was raised to think women had babies, stayed at home, and men worked. By the time I got ready to do it, I thought I had all the answers. Only somebody had changed the questions.

- Lewis Grizzard

Show business is my life.

Show business is my life.

- Lewis Grizzard

Sex hasn't been the same since women started enjoying it.

Sex hasn't been the same since women started enjoying it.

- Lewis Grizzard

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

- Lewis Grizzard

It's difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato.

It's difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato.

- Lewis Grizzard

I gave 738 Rotary Club speeches, and it was just driving me crazy, so someone said, 'Why don't you charge money?'

I gave 738 Rotary Club speeches, and it was just driving me crazy, so someone said, 'Why don't you charge money?'

- Lewis Grizzard

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

- Lewis Grizzard

I don't think I'm a bigot or a racist. But I have a truck, a Blazer. I drink beer. There are some women I do hate.

I don't think I'm a bigot or a racist. But I have a truck, a Blazer. I drink beer. There are some women I do hate.

- Lewis Grizzard

I wish one time in my life I could do what other writers do... get me a villa in Spain and go there to write a book.

I wish one time in my life I could do what other writers do... get me a villa in Spain and go there to write a book.

- Lewis Grizzard

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