Author: Tim Allen

Quotes

Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me.

Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me.

- Tim Allen

I love doing logos. I've been a graphic artist all my life.

I love doing logos. I've been a graphic artist all my life.

- Tim Allen

Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.

Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.

- Tim Allen

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.

- Tim Allen

In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.

In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.

- Tim Allen

I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.

I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.

- Tim Allen

I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody's car.

I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody's car.

- Tim Allen

I have an only child. She's so independent and good with adults.

I have an only child. She's so independent and good with adults.

- Tim Allen

Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.

Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.

- Tim Allen

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