Author: Artie Lange

Quotes

And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote. I got the money to do it, and I would star and all, because of being on Howard.

And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote. I got the money to do it, and I would star and all, because of being on Howard.

- Artie Lange

By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't plan on working that long.

By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't plan on working that long.

- Artie Lange

It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world.

It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world.

- Artie Lange

Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.

Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.

- Artie Lange

Whiskey will always be a part of my life.

Whiskey will always be a part of my life.

- Artie Lange

The road is a lonely place, and that sounds like a cliche, you know, like what is my life?

The road is a lonely place, and that sounds like a cliche, you know, like what is my life?

- Artie Lange

It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.

It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.

- Artie Lange

Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that.

Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that.

- Artie Lange

I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.

I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.

- Artie Lange

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