Author: Dave Barry

Quotes

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers.

- Dave Barry

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

- Dave Barry

Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.

Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.

- Dave Barry

The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery.

The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery.

- Dave Barry

Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes.

Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes.

- Dave Barry

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.

- Dave Barry

The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.

The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.

- Dave Barry

Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.

Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.

- Dave Barry

It always rains on tents. Rainstorms will travel thousands of miles, against prevailing winds for the opportunity to rain on a tent.

It always rains on tents. Rainstorms will travel thousands of miles, against prevailing winds for the opportunity to rain on a tent.

- Dave Barry

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